Besides being extremely behind on the Quiz material, my cat dying, my new cat having cancer, and trying to plan out my character for the Clone Hearing project in Endeavor, I've also had to deal with my family, Bible Quiz team member...dilemmas... and lack of time Ryan chooses to spend with me. Plus, I need to work on my English so I no longer write run on sentences.
Bible Quiz:
- 2 problems come out of Bible Quiz. I just don't have the time, the drive, or the patience, for memorizing the material. Lame excuse, I know, but I mean, come on. The older kids are homeschooled... they have a lot of time to spend a couple hours a day dedicated to memorization. The younger kids (2 being homeschooled...) Haven't gotten to the highschool level of work thrown on you. 6 hours of my day are spent actually on campus, plus another 1-2 hours of homework. I also have to have time to keep up with my family, friends, and anything socially involved. I know that being joined on a competitive team means putting in some effort... hey, I show up. That's enough right?
- Also, I guess a lot of my desire for it has been lost in the never ending battle with a... not really team mate, but a coach... I'm so done with it. I've talked with other coaches, our head of our team, and now finally our youth pastor. Still absolutely nothing is changing. If he would listen to me, I'd talk to him. If he wasn't such a jerk to people, then we wouldn't have this problem... I've resorted to just leaving it alone. Don't get me wrong, the next inconsiderate remark he makes will be called out on, but I'm not going to let him get to me and dictate my life outside of him by constant thoughts of how much I dislike him. :)
Shadow to Tara:
- As many know, my kitty, Shadow, died a little over a month from a wild animal attack in my own backyard. Life has been so stressful since. I now have 5 more cats, along with our previous 3 dogs. But, one of the cats we bought, Tara, was a rescue kitty that we found about a week and a half ago. Her an I really bonded. She's so sweet and loving and just a cuddle bug. But, she's also deathly skinny. We took her to the vet only to find she might have Hyper Thyroidism. There is a surgery for it, so we weren't too worried, besides the fact that it would cost about $850. Sadly, though, Saturday morning we woke to her throwing up. She hadn't been eating for a couple days, except for when we forced her. My mom and I took her to the vet where they told us she might have cancer or IBD along with Hyper Thyroidism. Thus meaning, she could only live for another 3 months or so. BUT, the cancer hasn't been proven yet, so she might not have it and she might live for another 5-6 years. Either way, we can not keep her, because the stress of a multiple animal family will only make her worse. She already has a new home picked for her and that will be really suitable, but I still can't keep the tears from streaming down my face. I know she'll have better life, but, I still don't want to lose another kitty.
School:
- Actually, school is one of the easier parts of my life. Besides having to get up early, I'm okay with it. But, we have this one project to do on Friday that was a role playing activity involving subhuman cloning and what not. It seemed cool, until we found out our parts. Half the class is either a Senator or Senator's staff. Senators only have to ask questions and the staff does nothing at all. 'Concerned citizens' just have to decide why they are either pro or anti - subhuman cloning. The 'Clones' don't really doing anything besides consider if they like being a clone or not. Then, there the 'attorneys' who just help the person being persecuted for their work in subhuman cloning. That person is the 'Molecular Biologist.' They will be questioned... so they have to know all the answers to why, how, when, and what their company was planning to do with the clones. Plus, know their own personal history with the company. Guess who gets to be the Molecular Biologist... me... I'm not very excited. Plus, everything about me has to be a secret. Where I stand, what I did, if I did anything at all, and all other information about the Subhuman Cloning project that I might know. So, anytime I have a question or need to discuss something, I have to go out in the hall. All papers Mr. Fountain gives me, can't be seen by anyone else. It's really weird... and a bit too stressful for, but I'll get though it. I always do.
Family:
- I don't even know if I want to discuss my family. Haha. So much garbage going on with this subject. People not understanding where I'm coming from and only caring about their own opinion and how they act. I just feel like I'm constantly getting yelled at, having a "stern talking to" and am just being put down and talked down to. I feel like I was too nice growing up that everyone feels that yelling at me, or taking out aggression on me, is okay because they know I just listen and go on acting happy. It seems like everyone in my family has chosen me to complain about the other person, so I know all of the problems, but I still have to be nice to everyone, always have a smile, and act clueless. Sometimes, when I'm upset about something, I get in trouble for it because I guess I'm expected to always be positive. I guess I kind of know how my Grandma feels. All her children call her all day long to complain about the other siblings. It ends in my grandma having to settle every problem they have. Along the same lines, she has to act clueless, and the minute she slips up and accidentally tells another what the problem is, she gets yelled at. but again, with school, I'll get over it. Tonight, things will be all better until someone accidentally says the wrong thing, then someone gets yelled at, then it falls on me. Oh well. I still love my family. I still chose them over all things (Besides Christ, of course.)
Ryan:
- Not too much to really complain about with him. EXCEPT for the fact that he seems to never want to hang out with me. I only see him, like 2 or 3 days a week, and one of those days are Sundays where we're at church, don't talk, don't sit next to each other, and then usually split for the rest of the day with different plans. Then, during the week, he just has "too much" homework to come over or to pick me up from school. The most annoying thing is, though, is that when I call or anything, he's usually not doing homework. He's either eating, watching tv, on the computer, or playing Halo 3. (I hate you Microsoft.) He always reasures me he was working on his homework, but is taking a break, or he's about to do it. Alas, the quarter ends in December, so I just have to wait it out. Lame.
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